Every other turn, there is a 1 in 6 chance of an encounter. If there is an encounter, roll 2d6 to determine what
it is. Note that traps will appear even if the location has already been safely explored, and will only occur in
hallways. If a trap random encounter is rolled while the PCs are in a room, then they encounter the trap
when they next enter a corridor.
2
2d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords, led by a Hero with chain and sword and shield
and a thaumaturgist with Charm, Sleep, Hold Portal, Light, Invisibility, ESP, Lightning and a Vicar with
plate mail and mace and Cure Light x 2, Hold Person)
3 2d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords, led by a hero with chain and sword and shield
and a Thaumaturgist with Charm, Sleep, Hold Portal, Light, Invisibility, ESP, Lightning Bolt)
4 2d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords, led by a Hero with chain and sword and shield
and a Vicar with plate and mace and Cure Light x 2, Hold Person)
5 2d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords, led by a Hero with chain and sword and
shield)
6 2d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords)
7 d6 D’footians (Veterans with leather, shield, and swords)
8 Spear Trap (lead figure attacked by spear as if wielded by a Hero)
9 Pit Trap (d6 – 4 x 10’ deep, minimum 10’, 50% chance of spikes, 25% chance spikes are poisoned)
10 Trip Wire trap (poisoned darts shoot out at lead figure, save vs. poison or die)
11 Pressure Plate (ceiling collapses over entire party, 4 dice damage, save versus paralysis for half, passage
blocked)
12
Pit Trap (d6 – 4 x 10’ deep, minimum 10’, 50% chance of spikes, 25% chance spikes are poisoned),
when a character hits the bottom a stone block falls from the ceiling into the pit, doing three more dice of
damage, blocks passage

worst DM ever

The walls, floor, and ceiling of this room are all covered with mirrors. Not glass, mind you, but highly and intensely polished steel. Between the multiple reflections of everyone in the room, everywhere, made worse if the PCs are using torch or lantern light… they’re going to get lost if they turn even one corner in here.

Because all those little middle wall mirror sections… move. Most of them are Mirror Beasts (AC 5, HD 4, 1 attack for 1 die damage, any magic spell cast at them reflects back at the caster, area effect spells exempted… if the caster has a spell turning ring and it reflects a reflected spell back at the mirror beast, it creates a feedback loop that blows up the entire dungeon and beyond, forming a deep crater ten miles in radius. It’s a tough world.). But then, there are also a ton of doppelgangers imitating the mirror beasts…

When a character leaves this room, there is a 50% chance that he will be accompanied by a doppelganger that has imitated him. There is a 25% chance that he will be accompanied by two, a 15% chance he will be accompanied by four, a 9% chance to be accompanied by ten, and a 1% chance he will be accompanied by twenty! Check for every character that enters the room, and then leaves it.

>>6100318
Enjoy gettin mad when your players become so wary they avoid all your plot hooks for fear you'll pull a dick move

Opposite the door to the throne room is a giant carved crocodile head, mouth wide open, with a large diamond mounted deep within. A carving on the gem’s fixture (which can only be read if someone sticks a light source inside the mouth) says, “Kiss me.”

The first person to kiss the gem gains one point in a random ability score (the player should roll to determine which score, and the referee should roll as if making some random determination). The second person to kiss the gem will lose one point from a random ability score (again, rolls should be made). The third person to kiss the gem will lose one point from every ability score (again, the referee should roll as if it were a random effect). The fourth and subsequent persons to kiss the gem will be reduced to 3 in all ability scores.

If the gem is removed from its fixture (and it is solidly in place; the stone would have to be broken to move it), the mouth snaps shut, shattering the (fake) gem and doing four dice of damage to anyone leaning into the
mouth.

Inside the second door is the treasure vault, and crypt, of Karereca the Semi-Lich. Scattered around are 25,000 copper coins that have been painted to look like gold pieces, fifteen glass gems that appear to be incredibly valuable, one gem (indistinguishable from the others) that is actually worth d12 x 500gp, and several items which have no special abilities but detect as magical: two swords, a battle axe, a shield, a suit of chain mail, six vials of strange liquids of various colors and consistencies, and a staff. There is also a scroll case with a cursed scroll inside that will turn anyone who so much as sets eyes on its writing into an ardent pacifist who will absolutely refuse to carry weapons, wear armor, or engage in any activity that will result in the harm or confinement of another living being.

In the northwest corner, there is a statue of a naked man bending way over so his ass is sticking out. Along the base of the statue is the inscription, “Test of Faith! Reach in without fear and receive your reward!” If a character reaches in to the statue’s ass without fear, they will pull out a small diamond worth d6 x 100gp. Each character may receive one such gem. If any character acts cautious or suspicious, especially trying to examine the hole, then a noxious gas will shoot from the hole, killing all within a 20’ radius unless a save versus poison is made.

This is a luxury bedroom with a four poster bed (with satin sheets!), nightstands, a wardrobe, dressing screen, and crystal chandelier. Two chests are in the room, one in each of the far corners.

The first chest is locked and has a poison needle trap. Inside the chest is a cockatrice which will be able to attack by surprise in the first round after the chest is opened.

The second chest is also locked and has a poison needle trap. Inside is a pile of 500gp, but the chest is also full of yellow mold, which will most certainly be quite disturbed by the chest being opened even a tiny crack.

Under the bed is a cute little puppy… which is actually an ancient red wyrm which has been polymorphed and chained here. Its breath weapon still works (at full original power!) and it will not react to disturbance very well at all…

The bed itself is a clever coffin for a vampire. He rests inside the mattress! Anyone getting on the bed must save versus spells or feel very, very sleepy… and anyone sleeping on the bed is automatically surprised, attacked, and hit by the vampire!

The chandelier is quite volatile… if it is touched in any way, the crystal will explode, doing four dice of damage to anyone in the room and in the open, save versus breath weapon for half damage. It is made from living crystal, so the destroyed chandelier will regenerate itself in 24 hours, while the shards will decompose to nothing within four hours of exploding.

(cont'd)

The dressing screen has a design of a series of armed men on it, in various poses. On the opposite side of the screen (facing the southeast corner) is a magical transporter that looks like the picture of a beautiful naked woman, and anyone looking upon it is sucked into the dressing screen and then appears on the design, utterly trapped and unable to take any action. Curse removal or magic or evil dispelling will work to break the spell… but… upon a random victim. There are 53 people in the design before the PCs arrive, and an equal chance that each will be freed when the curse/magic/evil is gotten rid of. Roll randomly to determine each freed victim’s race and class and level (d8). Those in the screen for more than a year (all 53 already in) will be utterly insane and will attack whoever they see once freed.

The wardrobe has a set of magical clothes that will appear as any sort of style or fashion that the wearer wishes. Also there are a set of bright pink bunny slippers with a blinking nose which allows the wearer to move absolutely 100% silently, but renders them completely unable to hide in shadowy areas!

The first nightstand has a ruby ring worth 2000gp. The second nightstand has a ruby ring that is very hungry, and will eat any finger it is placed upon, and if it is placed with other treasure, it will eat that treasure at a rate of 1 gem per turn, 1 piece of jewelry per turn, or 100 coins per turn (in that order, most valuable coins first).

This room is absolutely stuffed with arms and armor of all types. Hundreds of maces, axes, etc (no swords, they’re intelligent enough to not be in this dungeon!), and dozens of suits of plate mail and shields and chain and… and… stuff! And it will all detect as magical! In tests it will all show up as +1 gear (10% chance that an item is + d4+1), but when used in actual combat, it will reveal itself to be cursed. Weapons will be minuses instead of pluses, and armor has a 75% chance to be a minus rather than a plus, and a 25% chance to simply make a character AC 9.

>>6100440

>>6101141
>LIFE MAGAZINE

>LIFE

what

>>6100318
i save, and then say "hey guys come take a look at this" to my other party members and sit back and watch

>>6101141
Motivationals are faggotry

Man, this thread makes me a little nostalgic. My very first roleplaying campaign was with a dick GM like this. He made us run through a series of pyramids once, and the traps were so lethal that every player had to make a new character at least once. I think I had to make two new characters, and one friend died three or four times.

We were taken out to the desert to help some idiotic excavation team who had built a small town instead of doing their jobs. We were supposedly hired to keep the archeologists safe, but instead of protecting them from the traps of the desert ruins, the archeologists sent us in first as canaries to be killed in advance.

The first pyramid we visited was the worst since we weren't expecting any of it. We were walking in a group and a massive pendulum axe swunge out from the wall, killing fully half the party at once - the other half of the party passed their dexterity rolls. After that we traveled a little further down the hallway where a pit trap opened up, nearly killing us all again.

It was dark, and we couldn't see what was on the other side of the pit, but I was playing a sort of tree sprite with leaping powers, and I attempted to leap across the pit to see what was on the other side. Frustratingly, it was a wall, so I collided with it and droped into the razor sharp spikes below.

>>6101888
Motivators don't smoke.

On the way back we were attacked by giant desert spiders with poison and paralysis attacks. They were too strong to fight off, so they paralyzed another player and dragged him off for eating. We couldn't beat the spiders because they were too strong for us individually and had come in a swarm, but none-the-less the GM scolded us for letting a comrade get killed at the end of combat.

When we finally got back to the archeologist's camp, the archeologists were starkly unimpressed and unsympathetic. They declared we hadn't been thinking and that our fatalities would have been avoided if we had acted more intelligently. Those of us who died had to create new characters, and the following day we set off to explore the next three ruins.

Long story short, poison needles, pit traps, giant spiders, and a roving elder dragon who was having a bad day deterred us at the second ruin. We lost half the party again, and then refused to go out exploring anymore. The archeologists scolded us and told us we weren't doing our jobs, and we told those NPCs and the GM that he could suck our dicks. Fuck him.

After that the GM threw us a bone and "let us" figure out that the ruins were just part of some asinine star map that led to where all the ancient civilizations treasures were buried. As it turned out, the entire trove was directly beneath the archeologist town, and we found verifiable proof that this was the case. However, when we tried to tell the archeologists they needed to dig up a corner of the town, they refused, stating that they would not destroy all their hard work establishing this camp for the idiotic notions of a bunch of stupid mercenaries.

So we had to sneak into one of the buildings in the night and pry up the floor boards ourselves, and we dug until we uncovered the entrance to the treasure trove, which was incidentally guarded by invincible mummies and an invincible mummy king who projected an impenetrable field of darkness around him. The ensuing battle with the mummy king lasted hours because the GM had arranged for only one player to be able to see in the dark, and the one player was a rogue with rather poor combat skills (and a new character thanks to previous death).

When it was finally finished, we were sitting on an untold fortune. There were magical items worth billions, and all the coins were made of an extraordinarily rare kind of metal that was worth four times as much as platinum. However, the archeologists, who had done nothing except for making a town and hiring us, claimed everything for themselves, and we weren't allowed to take anything as a finders fee. Instead, the promised us something like a 10% cut for our efforts, which in the end we reasoned wasn't bad since 10% of infinity billion was still quite a lot.

We were taken back to the archeologists' homeland ad they sold everything in a giant auction. Our characters sat in on the auction and helped drive prices up to increase our own profits, and we even bid a few hundred thousand on some of the more wildly powerful items. However, when the auction was finished, the archeologists gave us $200,000, less than 5% of some of the individual bids. After that they charged us for the damages we did to the desert town, and then they brought it to our attention that the only way off the homeland at the moment was by purchasing an airship. The airship cost us two million full silver, and on top of all that, about a month later in real time when the party had saved up enough to make around 70% of the payments on the ship, it got reposessed by the GM's bastard airship building guild. After that they allowed us to rent the thing as long as we payed a fee each time we took it out of the docks.

tl;dr
Fuck this GM and all GMs like him.

>>6102283
>>6102024
>>6102111
>>6102188

holy fuck i got angry reading this, how did you not punch the GM in the face?

>>6102283
kill the folks, take the gold...win.

>>6100440
That one's actually reasonable and kinda clever.

>>6100355
Couldn't you just mar the mirrors with scratches or some-such? That would be my plan.

>>6102283

I hate to be The one advocating this, but you're adventures and those townspeople are not. You should have ducked thier shit up. I doubt they would have had the ability to fight back short of DM dickery that you could have (and already should have) called him on.

>>6102431
agreed you got screwed over hard

>Pit Trap (d6 – 4 x 10’ deep, minimum 10’
You're a 4e jackoff aren't you.
durr hurr
d6 - 4 = minimum 1 and maximum 2
Just flip a fucking coin, jesus fucking fuck.